The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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Archive for February, 2009

Gossip, Squares and Wonked Computers

Posted by thedarwinexception on February 3, 2009


Ok – Haven’t updated in a while, so this will probably be LONG. 

First off – my computer is wonking out (again). Needs to go to the shop – BAD. And I am having a problem getting my email on my laptop – so if you wrote me in the last week – send me another email at darwinexception at gmail dot com. I get some mail on the laptop, but I think I only get Verizon email. At least it seems like that’s the pattern. 

So, I set up a gmail account. Which should actually be a good thing in the long run, since that system is searchable, and I’m thinking searchable could prove useful after a while. 

And – I have tons of gossip for you all. Because I know you guys love a good juicy piece of gossip as much as I do.  Good God. 

Ok – we all know preemie mom, right? Well she and her boyfriend broke up (again). 

And after they broke up, preemie mom went on the internet looking for love – and someone to take care of her and her kids, I imagine. She also relocated to her moms house in Saranac Lake, while preemie dad stayed at his mom’s where they all had been living. 

So, preemie mom finds love on the internet. Only the guy lives in Ohio. What to do? What to do? 

She has her sister and her sister’s boyfriend drive her to Ohio to meet up with her new love – oh, and she drags her two kids with her. Because really, why not, right? 

So, the sister and her boyfriend get to Ohio, and decide fairly quickly that Ohio is “scary” and they decide that they aren’t staying. Now, I’m not sure exactly what the original plan was – if they were all going to live with internet guy forever and ever or if this was some kind of Vay-Kay or what, but the sister and her boyfriend bring Preemie mom to the internet guy’s house, take one look around and decide that they are leaving – which means they have now left preemie Mom there, with her two kids under the age of 2, no money and only a diaper bag full of whatever preemie mom decided were “essentials”. 

So, preemie mom knocks on the door to announce to her new found love that she has arrived, and she’s there with her kids and can he now “support me, please?” and here comes her new man – only he turns out to be a 15 year old kid who lives with his mom and his little brother and sister. 


And now let’s stop right here and assess this situation. 

Now, if I was internet guy’s mom, at this point in the story, I would have looked this woman up and down and said “ummm…excuse me? How the fuck OLD are you?” [she’s 19]. Then I would have explained that there was absolutely no fucking way in hell she was entering my home. And I would have sent her on her way. 

But apparently, Preemie mom was allowed in the house because she immediately made a phone call back to her mother in Saranac Lake. “Mom? Can you come and get me?” To which she was told “I don’t have any gas money to go all the way to Ohio and back. You’re fucked.” So then preemie mom’s mother called here to Malone to Preemie dad’s mother and asked “Can YOU give me gas money to go get Preemie mom and the kids in Ohio?” 

Preemie Dad’s mother – who is a bit more practical and realistic than the rest of the players in the story – says “The only way you are getting gas money out of me is if I am in the car and oh – by the way – when we get back to New York, I am taking the kids home with me.” 

I guess this wasn’t a workable idea because Preemie Mom and the kids are still in Ohio. And really, you gotta wonder what internet guy’s mom is thinking about all of this – and oh, I wonder if internet guy is grounded? Too damned funny, I swear to God. 

The other little tidbit is that the reason Preemie Mom and Preemie Dad broke up THIS TIME is because Preemie Dad was been sleeping with a certain someone – who is the WIFE of one of Paul’s friends. 

Which leads to the question – do I tell the guy??? 

I want to. I want to SOOOOO BAD. I SOOOO want to walk up to the guy and say “Your Wife is a HO, dude!” 

But Paul won’t let me. 

Because I don’t have “Proof”. 

Of course, I’m really not sure exactly what constitutes “Proof” in Paul’s mind. I mean, I think he thinks I have to like have the camcorder ready and catch them fucking on the lawn. *That* would be PROOF. Proof, in MY mind, is Preemie Dad TELLING everyone who will listen that he’s banging the chick and she’s buying him stuff, which is what he’s doing. Oh, and maybe the fact that his girlfriend believed him enough that she packed up his kids and left. But, Paul doesn’t think that’s “Proof”. 

What do you think? Would you tell the guy? Anonymously or in person? Or would you shut up and leave it alone? 

In other news, I’ve been talking to Zombie Lady’s son. Looks like Zombie lady is down for the count for the foreseeable future. She is in a halfway house undergoing therapy for the operation she had on her legs last summer. I mentioned to the son that the house is deteriorating and that maybe it would be  a good idea to rent it out while she’s gone. Of course, I had ulterior motives when suggesting this, because I wanted Malone Leslie to move in next door. That would be awesome (for me more than for her – but there are some perks for her in it.) But, there are some real advantages for Zombie Lady and her son – first off, the house HAS to be better with heat and lights and life in it. The way it sis is terrible – there is mold, critters, garbage rotting, frost and snow on the walls and windows and this Spring when all that stuff starts to melt, the moisture is going to be sitting thee in the walls and floors and soaking all that moisture up to create more mold and nasty shit. 

And then there’s the money that could be generated from renting it – at least it would be some funds towards the taxes and Zombie Lady’s pockets. Zombie Lady’s son did see that as a plus – since he is the one who has to now come up with the taxes while Zombie Lady is in the halfway house. 

But, the son knows his mother, even better than all of us do, and I think even *WE* can guess that she might not be thrilled with “people in her house”, right? We all know that she’s way too paranoid for that. But, I did get her address, so I’m going to write her and let her know that she is missed and that I REALLY want her to get better SOON so she can come HOME.  AND I still have funds that were contributed through the blog, and I’m going to leave it all up to you guys – but, should I send her the money so she has some spending cash, should I send the money to her son for taxes or should I leave the money in the account until she gets back? It’s up to you. Let me know what you think either here in comments or to the gmail account above. 

In OTHER other news, I am halfway done the first square for the afghan. I’m glad I started with this square – it’s easy and it’s re-introducing me to cables. And I finished the scarf. Which I love. I have GOT to make me a scarf. 

Tomorrow or the next day I think I’ll be finished with the square and I’ll do an official entry on how it went, what materials I used, accessories you MUST HAVE, how long it took and how complicated it was. Hopefully with pictures, but I’ll have to attach the broken printer to the laptop and I’m not sure the inherent complications in all that. It was a pain in the ass to load FrontPage on the laptop just to write this entry.

We’ll see.


Posted in GAAA, Knitting, Malone, Neighbors | 30 Comments »