The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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I’m On The Tour With Broken Pipes

Posted by thedarwinexception on April 16, 2008


So I think I’m famous or something.

I’m on the tour.

Yesterday a small blue bus came down our street – turned around in zombie lady’s driveway and then went back up the street. For a minute I thought “Oh My God – Zombie Lady is home – they are dropping her off!!” But the bus never stopped – it just came to a rolling stop in the driveway then turned around – so unless they like threw her off the bus, there was no way she was on it.

But it was full of people – and as it turned around and went back up the street I noticed it said “Mini Tour” on the side.

So I think my fame and notoriety has spread so far and wide that I am now on the tour. Or at least Zombie lady’s house is.

Our pipes broke (again). So Paul had to spend all day yesterday fixing that. It was scary this time – this time the pipes broke in back of the fridge and when the pipes broke there was this huge geyser and then SMOKE. Scared the loving fuck out of me – since I was standing right next to the fridge at the stove making supper. I was more worried about he smoke than the water spray happening. I yelled up the stairs “PAUL!!!! PAUL!!!” and he must have heard the geyser because he came running down the stairs immediately.

He went into the basement to shut the water off and I yelled down to him “IS there smoke down there?” Because I was still more worried about all the smoke I was seeing. He yelled back “I don’t know I can’t fucking see anything!” Which worried me more so I yelled back “Is it because of smoke?” And he said “No it’s because the fucking bulb is burned out.”

When he came back upstairs he said that the smoke was because it was the hot water pipe that broke this time. The smoke was just the steam from the hot water gushing out.

But – he fixed it and all is back to normal in the water department now. Thank God.

Saturday was Val’s auction for the March of Dimes. It was quite successful – which is nice because it’s a good cause and Val is a great person for doing all she does for the March of Dimes and the community in general.

I had donated 2 sweaters to the cause and Val made them look all pretty and nice and she told me that they got lots of bids and made some good money for the March of Dimes – which made me feel good.

And the lace and diamonds set went off to its new home – a reader here had asked I make it for a baby shower she was attending. The new mom loved it and so did the reader here – so that was a good thing.

I’m still working on the baby boy sweater and the dishrag sweater and still sucked into the stupid Ravelry thread about MCY Yarns and the faked death and that whole debacle.

Now someone has started posting to Ravelry that s/he is “a helper” and is going to refund everyone’s money. Although they never quite get as far as actually forking any money over – instead they answer requests for refunds with cryptic bullshit like “You used the yarn – no refund for you.”

And I’m out in my “Dancing with the Stars” pool. I joined a little group that assigned dancers to everyone at the beginning of the season – I drew the short straw and got Priscilla Presley. She was out last night – so there goes that. Now watch David Cook get kicked off of American Idol just to make the week complete.

But – the one good thing about the Ravelry thread and all the mysterious Danielle bullshit is that it has *SO* stoked me for a new trial. I thought after the Phil Spector reporting that I would never be ready again – but I SO AM. I find myself reading that 7500 post long thing on Ravelry thinking “My God – I could SO report on this!!!”  It’s just ripe with drama, intrigue, faked death, fake obituaries and Memorials – sightings of the formerly dead Danielle in Wal Mart – yarn hanging to dry in her front yard.

I’m telling you – all we need is Punkin Pie in a low cut shirt and we got ourselves a story.








10 Responses to “I’m On The Tour With Broken Pipes”

  1. HT said

    Why are all those pipes bursting? I laughed out loud Paul couldn’t see because the bulb was burned out and not because of the “smoke” that really was steam.

    I know you don’t give a shit but I just bought a new car. I bought a 2007 Toyota Solara convertible, red with a tan top. I’m selling the Solstice (sports car) and the old Camry. I’m simplifying my life, can’t you tell?

    If they’d ever charge that police chief in Illinois, that’d be a good trial since he brings out the worst in people. You know, a guy you love to hate. What do you think of the sect/sex? That might be a good one too. Lord knows, we have a lot of potential crime trials. You could have written about Princess Diana’s inquest jury trial. I never knew there was such a thing.

    That yarn “yarn” sounds kind of fun but I don’t want to get pulled into it. You sure got suckered. I never would have thought it. You’re weakening.


  2. kizzzy said

    awwwwwwwwww I been waiting all week to find out about your barn squatters!

    I sure am hoping you or someone covers the second Cynthia Sommer trial coming up in May!

    I too am waiting for ZL

  3. mbmb said


    You just missed a great live trial on CTV…I mean Tru TV. Of course you have to watch part of it on a live stream off the computer and part on the television. But, it really was a great, ugly,& greasly trial. If you are into that sort of thing. Which I am. I want to know all of the details, the why, the how, & the where. Thank goodness the little bastard who did the deed was found guilty on all counts. Here’s a one link & there are so many more:

    Is there any way you can check on Zombie Lady? Or is that out of the question? Don’t want to bug you. But, I’m still worried about that nice lady.

    Mary Beth

  4. sandy in Colorado Springs said

    I’m so spoiled by you. After living with your trial reports I tried to read my favorite Anne Rule’s latest. It was actually a bore compared to your writings/thoughts. Didn’t even finish her book.

    If you are having burst pipes, then ZL’s must be gonners. So sad she isn’t home and settled in comfort. Although the weather seems to go on and on. Yesterday it was 80 here, along with wild fires evacuating areas. As I write.. snow is coming down so fast and thick that the view is gone. Tis Colorado with shorts one day and snow boots the next. But you in the east have been getting late and cold weather this year with little respite. Maybe ZL is hanging out in her respectful assignment until it becomes warmer.

    Ha Ha. You are on the famous tour. This needs a name. Why else would a tour bus be in Malone?

    David Cook. Yes. So hope he wins. My favorite on DWS was Adam Carolla, a fan of his for a very long time. Guess this says something about my humor..or lack of. Of course this had nothing to do with his dancing. I was in awe with the kids.

    Jeesh, so much snow now the trees are going to be losing limbs with this one. 2″ fell while writing this and still coming down.

  5. noorbe said

    What a tease you are.:(

    Where’s Zombie lady……………?
    You wrote she would be back sometime in March, we’re almsot in May now.
    What’s going on in her house, are the pipes broken in her house, or what?
    After the big freeze…..

    Are “they” still living in your barn…………………..?

  6. Bob E. said

    How many people were on the bus? Twelve, with a couple extras for “alternates”? Maybe it was a jury panel that was being shown around the neighborhood of an infamous court-blogger, perhaps as a warning…whether to them or you, I don’t know.


  7. Gail theotherone said

    Kim, you are a real sweetheart donating a few sweaters for the benefit of the March of Dimes.:)

    I have never watched ‘dancing with the stars’ nor the other program you mentioned.

    Glad it was only some steam and not a fire, omg that would have been horrible. How are your nerves?

    If you ever break away from reading about the faked death at Ravler or whatever, LOL check this out:


  8. Greg Smith said

    Quote: kizzzy Says:
    April 16, 2008 at 5:47 pm
    I sure am hoping you or someone covers the second Cynthia Sommer trial coming up in May! End Quote

    Did you hear that the DA dropped all charges against Cynthia Sommer and she was released from custody this (Thursday) evening?

  9. kizzzy said

    Yes Greg I did hear. Good Luck to her!

  10. Florida Fan said

    You’re killing me Kim, what’s up with the barn squatter thing?

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