I Learned it in AFCA 09/07/07 – 09/13/07
Posted by thedarwinexception on January 9, 2008
From the Non existent FAQ: AFCA is a usenet group more formally called alt.fan.cecil-adams, that I frequent and enjoy, mostly for the brilliant, witty people there. Cecil Adams devoted his life and career to “stamping out ignorance”, and AFCA attempts to carry on this noble crusade.In AFCA, no question is off topic, no question is stupid (well, except for the stupid ones) and the people there, collectively, know everything about everything. Almost everyone there has their own “cower mortals” subject, which can range from anything from submarines to raising sheep.
Along with all the “gee whiz” information (“You Will Learn Stuff Here”) there are also some “inside” memes such as the calling of “band name” when two words happen to be written together in a sentence that sound like they could be used for a band, or the call of “Motto!” to something someone has written because we are still searching for the perfect motto for the group. And if you blame anything on the “cabal”, you are sure to get a reply of TINC.
If you express displeasure in someone, you’ll be told to hit them in the face with a rake, except for giraffes, because you can never get inside the mind of a giraffe, and despite rumors to the contrary, I have no basement.
For the longest time groo was summarizing all the weekly posts so that those who were away could easily catch up. He stopped doing it (the bastard). Rick does a weekly summary now, which is just as good as groo’s, although Rick calls it the “cheap imitation” summary. I summarize for the blog mostly to keep track of all the neat crap I’ve read on AFCA, and to spread the crap far and wide.
If you feel like reading more AFCA, point your newsreader to alt.fan.cecil-adams, or you can read via google groups – but if you do that, Blinky won’t see you. He killfiles anyone who uses google groups to access usenet. His inability to see you may or may not be a good thing.
YOU WILL LEARN STUFF HERE
“The venom produced by the Latrodectus venom glands contains several protein fractions of which alpha-latrotoxin is the neurotoxic fraction. It causes the massive release of neurotransmitters, changes in ion channels and inhibits vesicle recycling”.
Laidlaw International is “a holding company for North America’s largest providers of school and inter-city bus transportation […] [t]he company’s businesses operate well-recognized brands including Laidlaw Education Services, Greyhound Lines, Greyhound Canada nd Laidlaw Transit”
A heat stress index is a single number which integrates the effects of the six basic parameters in any human thermal environment such that its value will vary with the thermal strain experienced by the person exposed to a hot environment. Most heat stress indices consider, directly or indirectly, that the main strain on the body is due to sweating. For example, the more sweating required to maintain heat balance and internal body temperature, the greater the strain on the body.
Debit and credit cards look alike, but they’re two entirely different payment methods. While a credit card is a “buy-now, pay-later” tool, a debit card draws funds from your checking account.
The German word for “glove” transliterates as “hand-shoe”.
Anne Piehi, a professor at Harvard University’s Kennedy School of Government, has found that Latino immigrants, most of whom are of Mexican origin, have lower rates of incarceration than do the U.S.-born, Including native-born Latinos. She also contends that although recent Latino immigrants may fit the assumed demographic description of a criminally prone population (youthful with high rates of poverty and low levels of education), cities with dramatic Increases in the Latino immigrant population don’t experience higher-than-average increases in crime.
Similar to forensic identification of typewriters, computer printers and copiers can be traced down by imperfections in their output. The mechanical tolerances of the toner and paper feed mechanisms cause banding, which contain information about the individual device’s mechanical properties. It is sometimes possible to identify the manufacturer and brand, but in some cases the individual printer can be identified from a set of known ones by comparing their outputs. Some high-quality color printers and copiers steganographically embed their identification code into the printed pages, as fine and almost invisible patterns of yellow dots. The sources identify Xerox and Canon as companies doing this. The Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF)has investigated this issue and documented how the Xerox DocuColor printer’s serial number, as well as the date and time of the printout, are encoded in a repeating 8×15 dot pattern in the yellow channel. EFF is working to reverse engineer additional printer
“A greater percentage of homeschoolers compared to nonhomeschoolers were white, non-Hispanic in 1999—75 percent compared to 65 percent. At the same time, a smaller percentage of homeschoolers were black, non-Hispanic students and a smaller percentage were Hispanic students.”
The Hmong, also known as Miao (Chinese: ?: Miáo; Vietnamese: Mèo or Hmông; Thai: ???? (Maew) or ??? (Mong)), are an Asian ethnic group speaking the Hmong language, whose homeland is in the mountainous regions of southern China (especially Guizhou) that cross into northern Southeast Asia (northern Vietnam and Laos). The term “Miao” is offensive to some Hmong people. …
“Children with autism appear to have a higher than normal risk for certain co-existing conditions, including fragile X syndrome (which causes mental retardation), tuberous sclerosis (in which tumors grow on the brain), epileptic seizures, Tourette syndrome, learning disabilities, and attention deficit disorder. For reasons that are still unclear, about 20 to 30 percent of children with autism develop epilepsy by the time they reach adulthood”.
Found in beef, sheep and other animals, suet is the solid white fat found around the kidneys and loins. Many British recipes call for it to lend richness to pastries puddings, stuffings and mincemeats. Suet was once widely used to make tallow candles.
Rabies has been eliminated from the US dog population after decades of vaccinations and pet licensing toward that goal, the US Centers for Disease Control announced Friday.
An early phreaking tool, the blue box is an electronic device that simulates a telephone operator’s dialing console. It functions by replicating the tones used to switch long-distance calls and using them to route the user’s own call, bypassing the normal switching
mechanism. The most typical use of a blue box was to place free telephone calls – inversely, the Black Box enabled one to receive calls which were free to the caller. The blue box no longer works in most western nations, as modern switching systems are now digital and no longer use the in-band signaling which the blue box emulates. Instead, signaling occurs on an out-of-band channel which cannot be accessed from the line the caller is using (called Common Channel Interoffice Signaling (CCIS)).
“Numerous small salivary glands are found in the oral cavity. These are best developed in birds that eat a dry diet such as seed and insect eaters, and least developed in birds that eat a moist diet such as fish. Mucus is the major substance secreted by the avian salivary
glands. It acts as a lubricant in swallowing.”
the Lockheed company of aviation fame was originally named and spelled after the two Lougheed brothers that founded it.
Pimps get black Caddies. Lipstick pushers get pink ones.
STUFF THAT MADE ME LAUGH
I once won such a competition without realising it was taking place.
I’m sure you can find one of their performances on Ewwww tube
It sounds to me like a big bag of post hoc ready to explode.
Please explain how you randomize one envelope.
GUESS THE AFCA’N
I just shoveled up five bags of composted horse shit today, and I’m so excited!
I have an unfurling phobia.
Eating off lime green dishes would just revolt me.When I see a lime in the grocery store, it rarely looks like it is lime green to me.I think the treacle sponge pudding messed with my brain.
Finding the perfect pair of shoes takes a lot of effort. Everyone should be congratulated on the achievement. That’s why I buy shoes so often. I like the accolades.
I’m not comfortable discussing my Mom’s boobs.
I’ve never had a way with women, but the hills of Iowa make me wish that I could.
I’d like to pet your monkey.
If I lose 20 more pounds I’ll be dancing naked in the street, blood pressure be damned.
Sometime when I bend over I make kind of a hissss.
I can do phlegmish when I have a cold
The thought of a ass meteor has me shaking in my shoes right now.
Hey, I just tell you the big ideas. Let the little people sort out the details.
Ignorance is what the other guy persists in mistakenly believing in.
it should be almost axiomatic that AFCA isn’t normal.
The end of the world is no excuse for thievery.If courtesy were the aim, there would be fewer “Fuck off”so in replies.Never let them mess with your shoes.
Look! A new thing to be grumpy about!
I felt bad because I met a man who had no feet, but I went home, had a sandwich, and I felt better.
I don’t expect sense on this planet, so don’t ask me where it’s going to come from.
Swift extinction is such a comforting thought.
If you’re going to insist on using logic and facts, you will be an utter failure at conspiracy theories.
It sounds like you need to try some Amish cooking.
Unrestrained nipples *always* attract a disapproving sneer.
FROM THE AFCA KITCHEN
“Sheep’s penis for the foodie. Wash it well and clean it. Then take brayed saffron, the yolks of ten eggs and a spoonfull of milk. Temper with fat and stuff the penis, but take care that it is not overstuffed. Blanch it, then roast it. Sprinkle with powder of ginger,
cinnamon and a little pepper.”
What’s wrong with good old bigotry?
If I take the host, will my pee taste funny?
Do you really think that we all regard Disneyworld as our Guide To Life?
What’s the ta-ta count at your place?
Do you get the same feeling after eating potato salad that’s been sitting out on the counter all day?
How does one produce offspring on the phone?Is it illegal in England to have a bath after midday?
Wouldn’t be the first male who traveled that far for a piece of tail.
It’s not the sex that was the problem, it was the side effects.
Iowa and Kansas are two words for pretty much the same thing.
Well, you can’t get much whiter than Norwegians
We’re talkin’ Kenny Loggins, so it’s not a LOT of soul.
Sex is hereditary. If your parents didn’t have sex, chances are that you won’t have sex either.
Cash has a soothing feeling when you handle it.
The One Horseman And Three Pedestrians Of The Apocalypse!
IconodanticSea of RabiesShattered Pianos
ON THE AFCA BOOKSHELF
“Horton Hires a Ho”.
PROBABLY NOT WHAT YOU THINK THEY MEANT
I have a four-incher right here in front of me.
BELIEVE IT OR DON’T
The cabal has voted and afca is no longer recognizing birthdays that fall in October.