The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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I Am a Material Girl

Posted by thedarwinexception on November 23, 2007

So? Did you go to Joann’s? I went to Joann’s at like 7 in the morning – should have went earlier, because by the time I got there, there were no carts left, people had 4 and 5 carts full of bolts of flannel. And some people had bolts that I wanted a couple yards of, too. I went to the flannel section got like 6 or 7 bolts that I wanted, carried those back to the front of the store and waited for a cart to open up. I didn’t have to wait long, since there was a line from the register to the cutting table of people waiting to check out, and I grabbed a cart, stuffed my bolts of fabric into it, and then went back to the cutting table, where they had piles and piles of flannel bolts waiting to be put back on the shelves, and I grabbed about 20 bolts from there and put those in my cart.

As soon as I did that, a couple other people came over and started going through the pile of bolts, like they hadn’t thought of doing this themselves. Or maybe they had thought of it, but didn’t dare plow through the piles.

Then I went back to the flannel section and dug through there some more. And I ended up needing two carts for all the bolts of fabric, myself. I ended up buying the flannel, buying a couple yards of Jiffy Grip for the feet of the sleepers I make, a bunch of buttons, because those were on sale 50% off, too. I had 72 different print flannels that I got two yards each of, and then 5 different solid color flannels that I bought 4 yards each of. So it wasn’t as bad as last year.

And the bags are still sitting on my cutting table, because I have no place to put all this fabric.

The bad news was that when I got home from Joann’s, Paul had come home from work because it had started to sleet and rain. And he saw the bags of fabric. Uh-oh.

He said “What the hell is all that material? You have way too much material now. Where do you think you are going to store all that? You don’t have room for all of this.”

I just told him “Look, Paul we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl.”

But he’s right; I have no damned place for all of this.

And did you get your Wii over the weekend? When I was at Joann’s, there was a line out the door at Kmart of people waiting for their Wii’s. I guess the way Kmart set up the Wii getting was to give everyone a number and make them wait in line – and the line was out the inside doors and into the foyer between the inside and outside doors. So even though the store was open, all these people were standing there waiting in line with their numbers.

I was schlepping my bags of material over to Kmart to use the phone at the customer service desk. That’s al I wanted to do. I didn’t want a Wii. But I had to pass by the line of people clutching their numbers and yelling at me “If you are getting a Wii you have to wait in line!” “You can’t just go in and buy a Wii – you have to have a number!” I had to look over twice and say “I’m not getting a Wii.” But that wasn’t good enough – it’s like they thought I was trying to get one on the down low or something. Jesus. People are serious about their Wii’s.

I’ll tell you, though, it was great security. If you came out of those doors with a shoplifted Wii or one you got without a number – I think they would have torn you from limb to limb. Good thing formerly pregnant thief isn’t in town.

And I haven’t seen the zombie lady since Thanksgiving. I expected her to be knocking on my door trying to return the plate I sent her home with. But I haven’t seen her – and it’s bitterly cold out, too. I may invite her over to warm up – as long as she can entertain herself. I wouldn’t mind if she was here if she could like sit on the couch and just watch a movie or read a book or something – it’s the “entertaining” part I hate. I don’t want to have to sit there and talk to her or pay attention to her. So I may explain this to her and ask her if she wants to come over for a bit. And maybe to take a shower. She didn’t smell bad when she was here – but I didn’t really get close enough to smell her, and even Paul mentioned after she left that we should have asked her if she wanted to take a shower. It has to be a while since she’s actually washed up or washed her hair. Or even washed her clothes.

I don’t know how she does it, I really don’t.


8 Responses to “I Am a Material Girl”

  1. Holy Toledo said

    Do I have this almost right….170+ yards of flannel plus whatever was left from last year? I think that’s called a obsession or fetish if you sleep with it.

    When I went to Kroger’s TG day, I saw a bushel of pommogranates (sp). They’re 2.99 each. Do you want me to send you some for ZL? I think I still have your address.

    So Paul is a little steamed. I think you better be making him some flannel jammies with a drop seat…..


  2. Do I have this almost right….170+ yards of flannel plus whatever was left from last year? I think that’s called a obsession or fetish if you sleep with it.

    Well, I don’t know how much flannel I have – but I do know htat it doesn’t begin to address the hundreds of yards of cotton, the hundreds of yards of knits, the hundreds of yards of ribbing, the hundreds of yards of denim, the hundreds of yards of broadcloth, the hundreds of yards of fleece….etc. etc. etc. that I ALSO have.

    And I have NO ROOM for all of this – it lines the bedroom in boxes and boxes and boxes, and overflows the sewing room.

    And every time I want to make something new, I have to go BUY the material, because I don’t want to plow through boxes and boxes and boxes to find the material that I want.

    It’s a sad, sad thing.

    When I went to Kroger’s TG day, I saw a bushel of pommogranates (sp). They’re 2.99 each.

    I don’t know. What do you do with them? Do you squeeze them to make juice like lemons or something? I know nothing about pomegranates.


  3. Holy Toledo said

    You would give the pomegranates to Zombie Lady, you know, like a gift. Didn’t she say she couldn’t find any in Malone to bring to your house TG or am I having delusional thinking?


  4. DT said

    So Kim, did you rememer to tell the clerk the cloth was for clothing so it was non taxable?

    As for pomegranates, they are a favorite of my wife. If you have an Asian market nearby, they will be a fraction of the supermarket price, I think they are 69 cents at the Chinese store near my house, but several dollars each at the super.

    They are unlike anything else to eat. You split them open, and it is completely filled with seeds and pulp. You scoop it all out, separate the pulp and eat the seeds raw. Look them up on Wikipedia, there are great photos of the process.


  5. So Kim, did you rememer to tell the clerk the cloth was for clothing so it was non taxable?

    Yes I did! I only saved like $3.50 or a little more, but, at least it isn’t money they are getting for nothing. And I told the lady in front of me in line to tell the clerk it was for clothes – she didn’t believe me,but I said “Look, you have nothing to lose, right?” And she was amazed she didn’t get charged sales tax when she told the clerk that – and a little hostile towards the clerk, too, once she found out.

    Look them up on Wikipedia, there are great photos of the process.

    I may buy one,just so hubby and I can try it. I’m not a big fan of fruit,but hubby does love most fruits, so he may like this.

    They are pretty, if nothing else.


  6. Holy Toledo said

    I looked up the “poms” on wiki. I was amazed. They are like the best source of antioxidants there is especially for carcinogens. I ate one once about a hundred years ago. It was weird. I doubt very much if Paul would like it. I hope he doesn’t because they’re expensive.


  7. Greg (in Canada) said

    OK, this is a knitting story not a “material” story, but it still needs to be mentioned to Kim. Since I’m replying to a post three posts deep in the history, I don’t know if anyone is going to see it, but it still needs to be pasted.

  8. Glad you scored at Joann’s! Me, too! Except I had to battle Crazy Pet Bed Lady…LOL!

    With friendship,

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