The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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Welcome to Malone – Now in Vermont!

Posted by thedarwinexception on October 11, 2007

 So Malone was in the news this week in typical fashion – for being idiots.

Seems back in 2002 Malone prepared for its bicentennial celebration by asking residents to suggest a snazzy design for new welcome signs. A bunch of photos were submitted – even some of local farms, but the one that was chosen was a picture of The Jenne Farm. Which is a really nice picture of a typical red barn amid the beautiful fall foliage. The only problem is that no one deemed it important to ask the person who submitted the photo “Hey, did you snap this picture yourself, or just go on the web and look for a nice farm picture?”

Turns out that the picture chosen isn’t even a picture of a Malone dairy farm – it’s that of a farm in Vermont. And not just *any* farm in Vermont – it’s the reportedly MOST PHOTOGRAPHED farm in all of New England. The Jenne Farm has been on the cover of Yankee Magazine, in a backdrop of a couple of motion pictures and in a Budweiser commercial. You would think that someone would have caught on.

 

What’s odd about the whole thing is that when Paul and I first saw the sign, I recognized the Jenne farm picture – but then again, I’m from Vermont, and know the farm well. I just thought that Malone was going for a generic, “red barn among the orange leaves” stereotypical “small town, rural” feel. I didn’t think they were actually trying to pass off the Jenne farm as some local attraction – that would be rather foolish, wouldn’t it? After we had been here a while, it made even more sense to feature a Vermont farm on the welcoming signs, since what else is Malone going to put on their “Welcome to Malone” banners? The boarded up Main Street? The depot? A scene of the locals tossing toilet seats at the Redneck Games? Best stick with the bucolic beauty of the Jenne farm, right?

But, some eagle eyed Vermonter was passing through Malone a few weeks ago, saw the picture on the sign, and alerted a Burlington Free Press reporter, who came to Malone to see for himself if it was true or not, that the Jenne farm had been hijacked and was now welcoming visitors to a town that’s a state, a lake and a mountain range away from it’s actual location.

When alerted to the fact that the picture was a rather ubiquitous one and quite familiar as a Vermont iconic image, Malone officials said they were “unaware” of the image not being an image of Malone, which is rather disingenuous, if you ask me. I mean, did *no one* take a look around and realize that they had never actually seen this farm in Malone? Totally unbelievable to me.

But I have a different problem with the “Welcome to Malone” signs. I can accept and live with the Vermont image – I mean, if you can’t *have* an image of your own, go ahead and create one from someone else. I hear ya. But why do we have to have the message on the bottom of some of the welcoming signs in Malone that proclaim “Welcome to Malone – Come to Church with us on Sunday?” To me, this is more offensive than the picture of a Vermont farm on the signs.

Not everyone worships on Sunday – and not everyone worships in a Church. What about the families that worship in a hall, a temple, a mosque or a synagogue? I find the message offensive, exclusionary, discriminatory and invasive. I don’t like it.

If the question of “Do we Change the Signs” comes up, I am going to voice my opinion on the matter. And I will tell the town officials that if we are going to remedy the hijacking of an image for the town, maybe we should also consider leaving off the hijacking of faith.

Oh- and if there is another contest and new images are going to be submitted for the town welcoming signs, I’m going to enter a few of those, too!

 

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19 Responses to “Welcome to Malone – Now in Vermont!”

  1. A.D.A. said

    It’s a tossup between “Boarded-Up Main Street” and the Eiffel Tower, IMO.

    Re: “Come to Church…” I’d like to have one of those Onion bumper stickers that says “Jesus is my Car Insurance”, though I’d probably be stopped ten times on the way to work, and fired when I got there.

  2. Arm's Length said

    You are TOO TOO funny.

    ((SPOTTED: noted yesterday: in LA. T-shirt on a tall, leggy, cute chick. White type on black t-shirt:))

    Buy me something.

  3. Arm's Length said

    PS
    KIM:

    you could win a Webby.
    Here’s entry info.
    It’s not free, so if you want to solicit “sponsors,” I’m in, and will help plan a post-party in your hotel room!

    Go here…
    http://www.webbyawards.com/entries/categories.php

    (I’m a PR person in real life)

  4. karen said

    Hey Kim…I googled Malone, NY…the Malone Chamber of Commerce website is also using the image on the Jenn Farm on their homepage! Love you blog. Thanks for the laughs.

  5. skweekie said

    I like the last one.

    The Malinx

  6. Marie said

    What are you all doing having redneck games? I can’t imagine Yankee’s cowtipping and doing the cow patty toss (or dancing the two step under neon lights in a smoky bar for that matter…)
    But then, we’re talking Malone.
    I think it’s time and space warped somehow. =)

  7. DT said

    I love the sphinx! Here is my entry for the Malone contest: http://home.wowway.com/~dthompson4389/MALONE.JPG

  8. 2BReal said

    You really are a kick! Too funny! I truly enjoy your blogs.

  9. the Malone Chamber of Commerce website is also using the image on the Jenn Farm on their homepage!

    Too bad I made Leslie quit the CoC job – she probably could have done something about that.

    Kim

  10. What are you all doing having redneck games? I can’t imagine Yankee’s cowtipping and doing the cow patty toss (or dancing the two step under neon lights in a smoky bar for that matter…)

    Oh……you must not have been here for the Redneck Game fiasco.

    I dissed the Redneck Games, well, really, I dissed the HIJACKING of the Redneck Games by Northeners who don’t know the origin, the meaning and the culture behind the Redneck Games.

    I made the people of Malone slightly pissed off – to the tune of 7K hits in one day calling me everything from an “inorant cunt” [sic] to a “brook bich” (I love that one).

    I about got run out on a rail, I did. Call these epople anything you want -t hey can take it, but just DON’T diss their fucking redneck games.

    And by the way, I had the same problems with it that you did, and pointed out that throwing a few toilet seats and tipping a few cows doesn’t make someone a redneck any more than celebrating Kwanzaa makes me a prouod black sistah.

    They didn’t understand it – still don’t, I imagine.

    The original post is here:

    https://thedarwinexception.wordpress.com/2006/10/31/you-might-be-a-hick-if-you-think-youre-a-redneck/

    Kim

  11. Holy Toledo said

    I’m back in Hillbilly Heaven as of yesterday. Drove the Solstice down. A guy who looked homeless pulled up beside me in a red Solstice (mine is green) and asked me how I liked my car….duh….then proceeds to tell me he has *three* Solstices…..all red….I guess to match his neck. Never underestimate people who look homeless – they’re probably loaded.

    OK, to your blog. I loved the Sphinx the most, then the Eiffel Tower.

    So my birthday card to you had to be pretty appropo afterall. I didn’t even know about the redneck games. Did you get the card? I was hoping you’d give us all a rundown on the cards you got.

    Well, you little shit-stirrer, take a day off. One of the Malone-sters might come over to discuss the RN games and forget the gun was loaded.

    HT in HH

  12. Val Dalton said

    Hey where are all these come to church with us signs? I’ve never seen one…. but as far as the farm thing goes, i dont see why they would waste our tax dollars to change the freakin signs, a farm is a farm, does it really matter where its from, i just hope they didn’t pay the guy that won the contest any money… you’d think they would have authenticated the photo or something.

  13. Val Dalton said

    Oh i got a good idea, how about we take a picture of rainman and his blind girlfriend walking down the street in front of the flannagan lol ? Welcome to Malone!

  14. Hey where are all these come to church with us signs? I’ve never seen one….

    Oh, damn, I knew you’d ask – because I have NO clue what streets or routes are around here.

    But, anyway, if you go up the hill from my house – that street on the right if you pass my street – and then go down that long stretch of road – come back to town that way – there’s one of the church signs there.

    And there’s one if you are coming from Childstock farm back down the hill to Price Chopper. That’s the one I was going to take a picture of. I see that one all the time. And I think that’s the one I showed my friend when she came to visit – she had the same feeling about it as I did. Kind of pushy.

    Kim

  15. Oh i got a good idea, how about we take a picture of rainman and his blind girlfriend walking down the street in front of the flannagan lol ? Welcome to Malone!

    Oh sweet baby zombie Jesus.

    Well, you’ll have to take the picture – you’re the only one who ever gets to see him!

    Kim

  16. llylabrat said

    Careful, Kim. Somebody will accuse you of removing God from America, stopping prayer in schools, they will question your family values, and say you are starting a war on Christmas etc etc etc etc.

  17. ROTFLMAO! Actually why not put a picture of NYC’s skyline?!

    But yes, the Zombie Woman shoul definitely be the town mascot!

  18. Ron Sowards said

    Where is it written that that was an image from Malone? It’s not indicatated on the sign itself, and it looks like it could be a generic image from almost anywwhere in the country.
    Gawd, you must learn to relax a little, who gives a crap where the image is from?

    I agree with your point on the church-Sunday thing though, it’s probably from the old days before Americans were aware that not everyone on earth attends church….

  19. D.F. Manno said

    Ron Sowards Says:

    Where is it written that that was an image from Malone? It’s not indicatated on the sign itself, and it looks like it could be a generic image from almost anywwhere in the country.
    Gawd, you must learn to relax a little, who gives a crap where the image is from?

    Obviously, the people up in Vermont do.

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