Holly the Horse
Posted by thedarwinexception on July 20, 2007
So I was taking Milo for a walk today, and we got about a block from the house and I see a sign on the telephone pole: “Free Puppy to Good Home”. You couldn’t really tell which house had the “Free Puppy to Good Home”, because the pole was kind of in the middle of two houses. It could have been the house to the left or the house to the right of the pole.
But there was a guy standing on the porch of the house to the right, so I kind of yelled over to him “Are you the one with the puppy?”
He kind of yells back “Yeah, do you want to see her?”
And like an idiot I say “OK”. Because, you know, just what I fucking need is another dog, right?
So the guy shows me around to the back of the house where he has this permanent structure built that has wooden sides and looks like a scaled down version of an ark. It has windows in it with wire in them, and the top is half open and half covered with more wooden planks. I bend down to the wire door and he yells “Holly! Holly!” and soon this puppy comes to the door.
Only – she’s not *quite* a puppy – at least, not any normal puppy *I* think of when I think “Oh, what a cute puppy!” No, what comes to the mesh wire door of the pseudo-ark is what can best be described as a small Shetland pony. This dog is huge. So I say to the guy “Oh Shit! This is a puppy?” “Oh, yeah!” he assures me – “She’s only 5 months old!”
But the dog is very friendly, and Milo has gone up to the door and is sniffing and wagging his tail and the “puppy” is doing a play bow to Milo and running around and getting very excited. And then Milo starts whining because he doesn’t like the wire mesh door between them.
The guy says she is a Rottweiler and that if he can’t find a “good home” for her by the weekend, he is going to have to take her to the pound because she doesn’t get along with the chow he already has. I find it hard to believe that she doesn’t get along with his chow, she seems to be getting along with Milo just fine, and he says “Oh, the chow doesn’t get along with any other dogs.” Making me wonder why he got this dog to begin with, you know, if he already knew his other dog didn’t like company.
He seems to realize that I might be wondering that, because he volunteers that the only reason he has this dog is because he rescued it from his sister, who was abusing the dog and keeping it on a chain and leaving it out all night. He didn’t want her to have to be chained out all this winter, so the last time he was at his sister’s house, he just took the dog from them and the sister didn’t protest at all.
Now I feel sorry for the dog, and since I know that bringing the dog to the shelter is pretty much a death sentence, since people around here hate the shelter, and most of the animals there are too expensive to even be considered adoptable for most people, I want to bring the dog home. I mean, we are a “good home” – for a dog, anyway. Actually we are dog freaking paradise.
Besides, Milo likes her.
So I tell the guy Look, I can’t bring this dog home right now, since I have Milo with me and there’s no way I’m going to try walking two damned dogs home, but *don’t* bring the dog to the shelter, let me get Paul to come over here when he gets home, and we’ll see what he says. Paul has been wanting a big dog, anyway, the whole “cairn terrier” thing is ruining his image. It’s embarrassing for him, with all his “bad boy of Harley” tattoos and beard and leathers and crap to be walking down the street with dog the size of some large rats. He loves Ray and Lynn’s rottie, and when The Useless twin number 1 was here, he had a rottie Paul loved, too.
So, I go home and when Paul gets home I say to him “Want a rot?” He says “Why? Who has a rot?” And I tell him “Some guy on the next street over”, so he gets a leash and we go over to look at the dog, and well, now we have a new “puppy”. Only it’s not really a puppy, it’s a small horse. Who eats like a small horse.
So here is the newest member of the family, Holly the Horse.