The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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CA vs. Spector – A More Modest Slice of Pie

Posted by thedarwinexception on July 16, 2007

Well, someone must have spoken to The Pie about what it means to dress appropriately for court because instead of the “down to the naval” v-cut blouse she had on the last time she was on the stand, she now has a more modest shirt on, and those flat sagged out things that were probably spectacular punkins 30 years ago and now are more akin to some elongated zucchini gourds are reined underneath said modest shirt, and the whole world is a much prettier place. I haven’t been more frightened of a breast since that 40 year old pierced thing of Janet Jackson’s came flopping out at the Super Bowl.

The judge takes the stand and announces that the plumbing problem the jury was experiencing is now all taken care of – which reminds Roger Rosen, the defense attorney, to hand Punkin a box of tissue. Apparently she is going to display some waterworks of her own later on. And if we hadn’t seen this display, then maybe when she did start crying later in her testimony, it would have been more believable and heart tugging. As it is it just makes the later show of tears all the more manufactured.

Pie continues with her direct examination, recounting trips she and Lana took to Jamaica, Palm Springs and San Francisco. Rosen asks if Lana was in a direct to DVD movie called “Vice Girls” and Pie explains that yes, she was, and that she played a vice officer in the film – and packed a gun, and even had it in her hands during the filming, which immediately makes her jump to the conclusion that this is evidence that Lana was experienced and familiar with guns. Because, you know, Leo DiCaprio is now adept at piloting a plane, since he was “The Aviator” after all.

To head off what Rosen knows is going to be brought up during cross examination, Rosen then questions Pie about Richard Tomlin contacting her the day Lana was found dead. Tomlin went to Pie’s house and questioned her about her friend, whether or not she had been depressed or suicidal and when Pie had last spoken to or seen her.

Pie told the officer on this day that Lana had never been suicidal, that the only time she had ever seen Lana depressed was when Lana had broken her wrists and that she spoke to Lana regularly on the phone.

She then explains that this was all a lie – or rather, it was “a muting of the truth”. Rosen asks why she “muted the truth” and Pie has several explanations – each as unbelievable as the last. “To protect the integrity and honor of her friend” is one reason. And then she mentions that she wasn’t alone at her house when the officer came – that her friend Ann Marie Donahue was also present, and Ann Marie told Pie not to speak to anyone – including Homicide investigators – and that she shouldn’t tell them about Lana’s depression or suicidal thoughts. She discounted her friend’s advice to not speak to the officers at all, rather she chose to speak to them and just lie. Or “mute the truth”, as she calls it.

Her next reason or explanation as to why she lied or “muted the truth” was that the presence of the officers “triggered a sense of loyalty” to her friend. Which actually had me pausing the Tivo to wonder if being in a court of law facing Phil Spector, the man accused of murdering her friend, didn’t also trigger some “sense of loyalty”. Then I figured “Hmmm….must not” and I hit “Play” again.

Pie then outlined the “real Lana” and how the “real Lana” changed after she broke her wrists. Pie testified that it was depressing for Lana, since she couldn’t get the jobs she used to get, she couldn’t do the things she used to do, and her lack of employment led to an eventual financial crisis. She also talked briefly about a boyfriend Lana had named L.B. Moon, and how Lana was upset that this relationship didn’t work out the way that she had hoped.

She said that although Lana was referred to by some of her friends as “The Amazon Queen” because of her stature, she was not a “sports stong” woman, the way Pie is. Although I can’t imagine a sport on God’s green Earth that I couldn’t kick Pie’s ass in. And I’m not “sports strong”, I just don’t have the same two handicaps she has.

Rosen then asked about Lana’s propensity to take drugs and alcohol simultaneously, and asked Pie what that did to Lana’s behavior. Unlike Jennifer Botox-Hayes who described Lana as belligerent when she was combining drugs and alcohol, Pie said Lana was “demonstrative, gregarious and Happy” when she was taking Vicodin or Valium with her liquor. Leading one to wonder what this means for the defense. They want the jury to believe that it was a drugged out Lana who went to Spector’s the night of her death – a drugged out Lana who was then sharing a bottle with Spector. Would a “demonstrative, gregarious and happy” Lana then find a gun and shoot herself in the mouth?

Pie went on to testify about Lana and her new job at the House of Blues. Pie says that Lana was humiliated by the job, that she hated pulling out chairs for people she used to work for, or actresses she used to beat out for parts.

The Pie related a story involving a party she and Lana attended at Jeff Rankling’s house in Beverly Hills a week before Lana died.. Pie said that Michael Bay, the director of such movies as “Armageddon”, “The Rock,” “Pearl Harbor” and the current  “Transformers”, and most likely the upcoming feature “How I drove Lana Clarkson to Suicide”, was at this party and since Lana had worked with him previously on a Mercedes commercial, she went up to say ” Hi” to him. She went back to Pie crying and sobbing and Pie asked her what was wrong. Lana told Pie that Michael Bay had dissed her, that he said he didn’t know who she was. Pie then testified that Lana said to her “I’m sick of these people, I’m sick of this town and I don’t want to be here anymore.”

After this party PIe got a phone call from Lana, (and this is where Pie turned on the waterworks, availing herself of those tissues Rosen had given her earlier). Lana was again (or still) very upset and crying uncontrollably. She repeated her earlier thoughts of “I’m sick of this town, I’m sick of these people, I don’t want to be here. I’m done, I’m done, I’m done, I’m done.”

Apparently, though, this wasn’t strong enough sentiments for Rosen. He shows Pie her earlier testimony, with the exact wording that she had used earlier. Pie then says “Oh yeah, Lana said I don’t want to live anymore – I don’t want to be
here – I want to end it.”

Now, it may be just me, but I think there’s a huge difference between “I’m sick of this town – I don’t want to be here” and “I don’t want to live anymore.” It may be a subtle difference, but it’s a difference. And I think it’s telling that what Pie remembers her friend saying now is simply “I’m sick of these people – I don’t want to live *here*.” Because that’s different than “I’m sick of these people I don’t want to live. Period.”

I mean, I live in Malone Fucking New York. There’s plenty of times when I say “I’m sick of these people, I don’t want to live here anymore”. But I don’t think that this necessarily means I want to go to some aging, faded music producer’s house and off myself. Because, you know, there’s a whole wide world of places to live out there, and not all of them are Malone. Or Hollywood.

But the way Pie testified now, before the prompting and “refreshing of the memory” by Rosen is that Lana told her she was sick of the town, sick of the people and didn’t want to live there anymore. Nothing about “I don’t want to live AT ALL”. And it probably wasn’t a slip of the tongue, I really think that it was the way Pie looked at it and remembered it and processed it in her mind. I don’t think that she actually thought “Oh my God, Lana is suicidal”, because, As Alan Jackson brought out on cross examination, if she really did think that, surely she would have called someone, she would have phoned Lana’s family, or a suicide hotline, or a doctor. And she did none of those things. She testified that she cheered her friend up, got her to “a good place” and hung up the phone.

And that wasn’t the only “slip of the tongue” or “slip of the mind” Pie had on direct examination. At one point Rosen was asking her about a specific phone call, and Pie offered “You mean after the murder? Oh,  I mean, after the shooting?” Unfortunate, that. But again, I really think that’s the way Pie thinks of the event in her mind, as “the murder”. Otherwise, why would that phrase be the one topmost in her mind when she is casually thinking of it or referring to it? I mean, I think that’s a little like calling your husband by another man’s name after 4 years of marriage. That would be a little “odd”, don’t you think? And a little telling?

Jackson also elicited on cross examination that Pie never told anyone about this phone call and its contents until she got in touch with the defense team in 2005. Or they got in touch with her. She continued to “stay loyal to her friend’s memory” or stuck with her friend Ann Marie Donahue’s advice not to talk to anyone and not to say anything about Lana’s depression and suicidal threats, or kept feeling that trigger of loyalty that first hit her back when Tomlin first showed up on her doorstep the day Lana was killed. Jackson asks the witness when she had her “sudden epiphany” and decided that she needed to tell someone the truth and confess the terrible secret she had been keeping. Pie says that it was after she started getting physically ill from holding back the truth. She says “It was my conscience – I had to tell someone”. Jackson points out that it just happened to be the defense she confessed to. But Pie goes into a long rambling interlude wherein she explains that she doesn’t know the difference between the prosecution and the defense, that she doesn’t know who is working for whom and that all these people and their “sides” just don’t concern her or register with her, and that she doesn’t know a government investigator from a civil attorney. Which she apparently really doesn’t know, as she seems rather surprised when Jackson points out to her that the Clarkson family’s civil attorney works for neither the government nor the defense.

Alan Jackson also called into question Pie’s motivations for finally coming forward with this story of her conversation with Lana – and why she brought the story to the defense. Jackson pointed out that despite Pie’s testimony that she didn’t read any of the articles about Phil Spector and Lana Clarkson that she must have read one particular article – the one she told Tawni Tyndall about in 2003.

This was a Vanity Fair article and it mentioned David Kessel and his brother Daniel, who are investors in the “Backstage Cafe”, which just happens to be the only club that Pie has a continuing relationship with as a club promoter. She gave up her interest in promoting any of the other clubs she was working with after Lana died because “she lost her spirit”. According to the Vanity Fair article, David and Daniel Kessel are extremely close to Phil Spector – and have been for years. Pie testifies that she wasn’t aware of that until she read it in the Vanity Fair article. But she admits that, yes, after Lana died she only kept the “Backstage
Cafe’ as her client. She still had enough spirit left to work there.

Jackson also asks her about her relationship with Lana’s family, and how she felt they had “frozen her out” after an article appeared in Star Magazine which purported to be an interview with “one of Lana’s closest friends”. She denies having given the interview to Star, although she knows the family thinks it was her. She admits that this upset her, that she felt that they had “shut her out” after this article appeared and that she felt offended and slighted because of all the people giving interviews and being featured in articles that didn’t know Lana as well as she did, but she was sticking with her friends advice, as well as the advice she received from the family’s civil attorney to not give interviews and not make statements outside of the courtroom.

Jackson also asked the witness about the book she planned on writing after her part in the case was over, and Pie explained that she was not writing a book, that this was an idea brought to her a while ago by a friend of hers who is a writer. She suggested writing a book about Pie’s life in the music industry, and Pie suggested that the book begin with the day that Lana died, and move backwards from there because “this was her life – she had no life without Lana”. (She also used some more of Rosen’s tissues at this point). Jackson asks if she contacted a man named Elliott Mintz about this book, and she said she contacted him, but it wasn’t about the book. Rosen later allows her to explain her answer further and she testifies that the day after Lana died, she knew that  a lot of press would be looking to her to explain it all, so she contacted Mintz to help guide her through it all. She did not realize that this man was also a close friend of Spector’s until recently.

At the end of the court day, Jackson was really ramping up his questioning and getting quite nasty with The Pie, asking her if her motivations for coming forward with this story that is so completely separated from what she originally told the officers who questioned her on the day of Lana’s death was maybe for purely selfish reasons – that this was the one way that she could get the spotlight back on herself. That it was hurtful and offensive to her that the family and the press had overlooked her intimate and close personal relationship with Lana, and she felt so marginalized that she went to the one place where she would be welcomed with open arms and be made a great deal of and have her importance recognized – the defense table.

To which Pie asked “Are you freaking kidding me?” She then offered that this was “The second worst day of her life”. The worst being, of course, Friday when she went home and googled the pictures of herself on the stand Thursday with those ugly fucking pancake boobs of hers hanging out.

Tomorrow we should be done with our Pie. There are several Alhambra police officers ready to take the stand next. Including one undercover officer who’s face is not allowed to be shown on TV. The Judge joked today that he feared crime was running rampant in Alhambra since so many of their police force were in his hallway outside the court.

So if you live in Alhambra, lock your doors.


17 Responses to “CA vs. Spector – A More Modest Slice of Pie”

  1. Susan said

    I just have to say…Most Awesome!

  2. mbmb said

    I was so looking forward to your take on everything. You have a very unusual look on the trial, that I appreciate. You are a very gifted writer. I am just a trial junkie, and following all of it on CTV & KTLA…but, look forward to your take every night. Your sense of humor is so refreshing.

  3. Sprocket said

    Another witty and excellent recap of what happened in court today.

  4. barskin said

    Well, Punkin covered the girls, and the “and the whole world is a much prettier place.” Priceless! Thanks again for the witty and insightful coverage, Kim.

  5. Mizpah said

    Great writing!! Glad someone sees things as they really are. This business of “he’s innocent until proven guilty” is sometimes carried a little far. Smearing a great lady in an effort to try to save this obnoxious, self-absorbed, egomaniac is a crime in itself. I can’t believe people who knew him let him get away with his crazy behavior for so long…until he actually killed someone.

    One thing I have wondered about that wasn’t brought up, and it’s probably because I heard wrong?? Didn’t Pie say she had NEVER heard of Star Magazine, but when she tried to explain how her quote got into the magazine she stated that she was talking to a friend and the friend’s friend. The friend finally introduces her friend as “by the way, this is so and so from the STAR. She apparently knew then what the STAR was. Did I hear wrong?

  6. A said

    Talk about not dressing for the occasion….She could have at least wore a good bra!!Judge should have sent her home and change! Love your site.

  7. Didn’t Pie say she had NEVER heard of Star Magazine, but when she tried to explain how her quote got into the magazine she stated that she was talking to a friend and the friend’s friend. The friend finally introduces her friend as “by the way, this is so and so from the STAR. She apparently knew then what the STAR was. Did I hear wrong?

    No, you heard right. But Pie got several things “confused”, besides the Star thing. She also said she “never read any of those articles”, then owned up to reading the GQ and Vanity Fair stories. She also said that her friend the writer had asked about writing a book about Pie. First Pie said she wanted the book to “begin the day Lana died” and go backwards, then she said that the book had been proposed and had a treatment written that was presented to her back in 2000 – years before Lana’s death.

    I think she’s more concerned with saying what she thinks people want to hear than she is about telling the truth.


  8. valentin10 said

    Very good blog, very rich nice pictures and articles, congratulations !!!

  9. Greg Smith said

    Loved your comments. But Ms. Pie said “frikken”, not “freaken,” as my ears heard it.

    And, it’s always a good idea to keep your doors locked in Alhambra.

  10. Chris said

    I just found this site today, courtesy of the CTV message board, and I really enjoyed your take on the trial. Brilliantly creative writing combined with wit and sarcasm…what a treat in the midst of this circus of overblown egos and overpaid attorneys.
    Thanks! Keep it coming!

  11. geewhiz said

    thanks CTV message board for directing us to this site….great commentary…I want AJ today to ask what are the notes she has and what is she writing?!!!!!

  12. I want AJ today to ask what are the notes she has and what is she writing?!!!!!

    Taking notes for the book. She has to take notes – Miss Botox Hayes isn’t there to be her memory.


  13. Tamara Albert said

    I love it!! There is another person out there who thinks exactly like I do. The defense is an absolute JOKE. I am so glad I foung this website. You need your own show on Court TV!

  14. OJ Simpson said

    The prosecutor missed a key point: the pumpkin had to be refreshed on her recollection that her BFF threatened suicide. Who forgets that? PS Nice point about the “elongated zucchini gourds are reined underneath said modest shirt.” Too bad the prosecution didn’t mention that!


  15. Nancy said

    Why is it that these 2 supposed “best friends” of Lana’s seem to be enjoying testifying about her drinking habits and her being very, very, very, very depressed. It is one thing to have to testify under subpeona but they both seem happy to be there, not reluctant to talk about the private details of their friend’s life at all. They both dressed as though they were going to a nightclub. Pie is obviously preparing to write a book and the other one is trying to make the most out of her 15 minutes of fame! It’s quite clear that these two decided that since the prosecution wasn’t going to call them to defend their friend they would have to make sure the defense would call them to testify. They were going to insert themselves into this trial one way or the other even if they had to make statments that might help their best friends murderer go free. I find it very hard to believe that these 2 women were really good friends of Lana’s. They both seem to be acting and embellishing and exaggerating their testimony. I don’t find either of them to be credible.

  16. […] CA vs. Spector – A More Modest Slice of Pie [image]Well, someone must have spoken to The Pie about what it means to dress appropriately for court because instead […] […]

  17. Catherine said

    Wow! – love it! I have bookmarked your site also. Seeing the old photos of Lana’s BFF, and the live shot of them now on a split screen, is enough to make me cut back on the alcohol. Yikes! Pie looks so different! Typically when I get caught up in a trial on Court TV I develop a crush on the defense attorney. They are usually the most charismatic men in the room. Cody Posey’s (Gary ?) and Melanie McGuire’s (Joe), just to name a couple. Roger Rosen just creeps me out! I loathe him! Am I the only one being rubbed the wrong way by him? I want to throw something at the TV every time he gives the witness his lecture about not talking at the same time. He is so arrogant and obnoxious! If it comes down to who the jurors like, Alan Jackson wins! He is pure class. Plus, AJ has presented a great case against PS.

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