The Darwin Exception

because it's not always survival of the fittest – sometimes the idiots get through

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I Learned it in AFCA 03/09/07 – 03/15/07

Posted by thedarwinexception on March 16, 2007

[I am behind in AFCA this week. Mostly because I have been knitting and sewing a lot. Some of next week’s AFCA summary may actually be from the last couple of days of this week. Oh well, so sue me.] 

YOU WILL LEARN STUFF HERE

Despite its appearance, glass is really a highly viscous liquid rather than a solid, and you can see through it for the same reasons that you can see through water.

“Roquefort cheese is a particular bleu cheese that is made in the south of France. Some other blue cheeses are Stilton (England), Gorgonzola (Italy), Danablu (Denmark), and Americas’ entry, Maytag Blue Cheese. These are just a few, there are many more blue cheeses.”

The US military plans to have a fifth of its combat units fully automated by the year 2020.

“Young America Township is a township in Carver County, Minnesota, United States. The population was 838 at the 2000 census. Due to the presence of a major rebate-processing center (Known as Young America Corporation), the town has more than 20 ZIP codes, including the ZIP code 55555. 55397 is the actual delivery ZIP for the town, all ZIPs beginning with 555 are rebate/contest/fulfillment ZIPs.”

Uni (oo-nee) is the Japanese name for the edible part of the Sea Urchin. While colloquially referred to as the roe (eggs), uni is actually the animal’s gonads (which produce the milt and roe, sea urchins being hermaphrodites). Uni ranges in color from rich gold to light yellow, and has a creamy consistency that some love and is off-putting to others. It is nevertheless one sushi item that is in incredible demand around the world, which is reflected in its price. Uni has a light, sweet, and somewhat fecund flavor and is is usually enjoyed as nigiri sushi or sashimi. Uni is also sometimes served with a raw quail egg. Uni is also considered an aphrodisiac by some.

It is said that George Balanchine taught his cat, Mourka, to dance.

“Hotel detectives protect guests of the establishment from theft of their belongings and preserve order in hotel restaurants and bars. They also may keep undesirable individuals, such as known thieves, off the premises.”

Gen. Peter Pace, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, said Monday that he supports the Pentagon’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” ban on gays serving in the military because homosexuality is “immoral” and on par with having an extramarital affair.

“The 9/11 Commission says the idea of attacking Iraq also was pushed in a Sept. 17 memo by Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz. Wolfowitz argued that the odds were “far more” than one in 10 that Saddam Hussein was behind the 9/11 attacks, citing in part theories by controversial academic Laurie Mylroie that Ramzi Yousef, mastermind of the 1993 World Trade Center bombing, was an Iraqi intelligence agent. (The commission’s report found “no credible evidence” that Iraq was behind the 1993 attack-and no Iraqi involvement in 9/11.”)

Gates is methodically diversifying his wealth: He sells 20 million shares each quarter, reinvests through Cascade Investment in nontech companies, including big stakes in Cox Communications, Canadian National Railway, Republic Services. World’s biggest philanthropist also devoting $27 billion to good deeds. Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation fights infectious diseases (hepatitis B, AIDS), funds vaccine development, helps high schools.

The family of Brad Delp, the lead singer for the band Boston, said his death was a suicide. “He was a man who gave all he had to give to everyone around him, whether family, friends, fans or strangers,” the family said in a statement relayed by police Wednesday. “He gave as long as he could, as best he could, and he was very tired. We take comfort in knowing that he is now, at last, at peace.” Delp, 55, died Friday at his Atkinson home.

“As for the answer to who invented the Monkey Wrench there were several versions. One was that Robert Ripley proclaimed that the monkey wrench was invented by Charles Moncke a blacksmith. Some say it got its name because it resembles a monkey another version that a man named Monk a mechanic in 1856 invented a moveable jaw wrench and people started calling it Monk’s Wrench which turned into “monkey wrench”. There were other versions but it is still today called the “monkey wrench”. ”

STUFF THAT MADE ME LAUGH

This opens up the dicey question of anencephalics and zombies.

I’d use it as a way to get the kid to behave –  like “If you don’t clean up this mess you’ll end up like your brother”

I’m not a mind reader, stop acting like a woman!

Actually, we’re not sure yet.  Do they say “ooky ooky”?

At least in junior high, you got to keep your liver.

The present Mrs G wants to lose 4 stone (56 lb.) of ugly fat. I suggested she cut her head off.

Actually, they sold both.  An hour later, you were hungry for power.

Wait till you hear what we decided about *you*.

It caused my cat to run screeching from the room, and I don’t own a cat.

With disposable latex gloves.

CONFESSIONS

in 2050 I’ll be 90 and staggering around the nursing home demanding to know who’s stolen my New Yorker.

I don’t want to end up looking like Barney.

We love the Lichee.

I used to have burning chametz, but the doctor gave me some pills that cleared that right up.

WE SAY IT BECAUSE WE CAN

When I unzip my jeans, women scream, run up and throw their arms around my penis and squeeze it so tightly that their hands meet up on the other side.

It should be noted that this is the most insane, crack potted, loony tuney argument against conservationism ever uttered.

MOTTO’s

We are interested in reality, not in what strikes you.

Life is all about the cats.

Timing bowel residence time is just too much to ask, even of the most pointlessly punctilious.

Hey, my post was from memory weith no fact checking, so we’re in good shape here!
 
Do unto otters as you would have them do unto you

AFCAN ADVICE

Oh, and feel your nutsack really thoroughly on a regular basis. Know it well.
 
Worry about shoes for weddings, not funerals.

INNOCENT QUERIES

Could you get one of your siblings to drop by here and give us a brief character sketch of you?

Why would you call Boba Fett “Bruce”?

Linus boxes – is that what security blankets come packed in?

Jumpin Jesus H Christ onna pogo stick, how many kids did you HAVE when you were 7 or 8?

What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?

Do plumbers have dreams in which they are at work, people start giggling, and they realize that their pants have ridden up to completely cover their posterior?

could you be a little less specific?

How the hell do you go looking for James Burke and instead find Lesbian Mud Wrestling in Perth?

You’ve seen my fly’s butt, haven’t you?

Was it a Charlie Chan movie where the entire hotel was made of ice but the guy was killed by a real bullet?

COMPLIMENTS

You believe a LOT of stuff that isn’t supported by reality.

SIMPLE TRUTHS

No lady deserves to be rear ended without her permission.

You can’t have fun in Omaha. They have anti-fun squads.

People admire their possessions.  It’s one of the reasons they own them.

All children are natural, but some are more natural than others, and these are called “natural children”.

There’s a vas deferens between men and women.

BAND NAMES

a flock of penguins

late-descending testicles

Necrophiliac Mouse

Sympathy for avocados

burning chametz

Fir Knuckle

ALBUM NAMES

The demonization of eggs

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One Response to “I Learned it in AFCA 03/09/07 – 03/15/07”

  1. Dana said

    AHHHH. I had to go all the way to the end, but there I was. I’m happy now.

    How’s Paul?

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