Random Questions That Need Answers
Posted by thedarwinexception on November 11, 2006
Sometimes I ask questions that no one seems to have the answers to. Or they have the answers and the answers don’t satisfy me. Like the number 1 question below – “What the hell was wrong with the little girl doll on the Island of Misfit toys in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?” This is a question I have asked for years – it’s almost a tradition now in alt.fan.cecil-adams that I ask the question every year towards Christmas time. And every year I get a lot of responses, mostly along the lines of “she was a hermaphrodite” or “she had *issues*” or “she was psychologically damaged.” I don’t think any of those answers are the *definitive* answer, though. And I want an answer.
And it’s surprising that no one in AFCA seems to know the answer, because AFCA is the smartest group of people in Usenet. No, really, they are. I have been hanging out there for years, not because I am one of the smartest people around, and that’s where the smart people go, but mostly because I admire their smartness. And if you have a question, that’s the place to ask it. They’ll answer it – eventually. First, of course, you’ll have to put up with the smartass comments, the pun cascades, the replies of “Band Name!” (that’s when two words strung together sound like they’d be a good name for a band), the “Leroy’s”, which just means “Me too”, because some dude named Leroy was the first person to post a reply using only the words “me too”, and the inevitable thread drift, which, in AFCA, in the case of the above question would probably be demonstrated by the thread becoming a conversation about the density of reindeer hair. They’re like that.
But I have asked a few questions in there that no one ever got around to answering. So, if you know the answer to any of the below – please leave a reply and let me know what it is, because I’m losing sleep over this shit.
1. In “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer”, the one that’s on TV every year, what is wrong with the little girl doll? She seems to talk, to cry, to walk, what the hell is wrong with her that she ended up on the island of misfit toys?
2. In the “Wizard of Oz” movie – when Dorothy gets to Munchkinland and her house has fallen on the wicked witch, Glinda appears. She asks Dorothy “Are you a good witch or a bad witch?” Dorothy responds that she’s not a witch at all, that witches are old and ugly. The munchkins giggle. Dorothy asks who is laughing. Glinda says “The munchkins are laughing because *I* am a witch”. Glinda then explains that only *bad* witches are old and ugly; If that’s true – why did she have to ask Dorothy if Dorothy was a good witch or a bad witch – couldn’t she see that Dorothy wasn’t ugly?
3. Can I do this? I have a DVR – it’s the one that Time Warner cable offers, and isn’t as good as my old Tivo. Anyway, when I record something to the hard drive, it gives me the option after recording to “Save to VCR”. Now, I don’t want to save it to “VCR”. But can I save it to DVD? Is there some way to transfer the recording either to my free standing DVD player or to my computer for recording? Now, I can always hook the computer back up to the cable through the splitter, and record TV shows directly to the hard drive on my PC, then download it to DVD, but is there a way to make the DVR an intermediary and do it that way?
4. Why is it called a “flea market”? Was it once used to sell fleas for flea circus’s?
5. If I dropped a thousand messages in bottles randomly around the world in all the oceans and seas, on which shore is a bottle most likely to wash up on?
6. Was jelly ever sold – and is it still being sold – in glass jars with the wax on top? I want some old fashioned jelly like my grandmother used to make – but my granny always topped the jar with wax. Was it ever sold in stores this way? Is it still sold this way anywhere?