I am Awarded! With Pizza

So you guys came through! I now have awards! Some really nice ones, too! Check these out!

How’s those for awards? They are both going in my sidebar as of tomorrow.

And thanks to everyone who nominated me for an award or made one for me!

In *OTHER* news……

So last night I’m cooking dinner – turkey teriyaki and bowtie pasta with Alfredo sauce. Oddly enough, I can’t eat meat, or even smell it cooking, but I’ve found that pork and turkey don’t bother me to cook. Must have a different smell…

Anyway, so I’m cooking dinner and I get a knock on the door. It’s the formerly dead lady from next door. She has two pizza boxes in her hands. She speaks with a really, really thick foreign accent. I don’t know what it is but it sounds Russian. So in her really thick Russian foreign accent she says “You share, no?”

So I look at her and at these two pizza boxes and say “Huh?” I mean, I understand “Here, I made extra, take this” but “Share?” And who buys pizza for the neighbors? What the fuck does “share” mean, does she want to come in and eat with us? Is this her leftovers? So I say again “Huh?”

She says “I get much pizza – but no red, I no get red, I get two – you share, no?”

Really confused, I say “Pizza?”

She says again – “yes, yes, no red – two pizza. You get plate, no?” Then she opens the first pizza box and I see a totally white pizza – which is kind of neat, I’ve never had white pizza – and at least now I understand why she keeps saying “no red”. So I say “just a minute” and I go get a plate.

When I bring the plate back she has the pizza cut in two and she slops half the pizza on the plate. I say “Thank You” and try to smile and nod and she says (really loudly, too) “No No! You wait!” And from the tone in her voice, I didn’t dare do anything but wait.

She then opens the second box and it, too, is a white pizza, but it looks to be one of those Hawaiian pizza’s, because it has pineapple, I think, on it, and ham and olives – but no red sauce.

She hacks off about half of this pizza, as well, as puts it on the plate over the other one. She then closes the box and says “We share, no?” and she turns around and leaves.

I bring the pizza on the plate up to Paul, and hand it to him, and he says “You made pizza?” and I say “Yeah, I made pizza, fool.”

He ate both halves of the pizza and then ate the turkey teriyaki, the bowtie noodles with Alfredo sauce and then he ate a couple of donuts for dessert.

He didn’t die from the pizza or anything, so I guess it was OK. I wasn’t going to eat it, though, I don’t eat zombie food.